Hey hoes. Guess who’s back? Your main hoe. I’m sorry for going cold on you but you know how life goes, one minute you are strolling down the street next you are twerking in the 90’s at a Puff Daddy concert. Life just comes at you man.
In my little hiatus, as we shall refer to it, I had not been sitting on my thumbs, oh no no no my dearies, your main hoe has been doing thangs but today is not the day to deal with those thangs. One of them thangs that I had been doing is backing, you know, because this is a baking blog….
So, a little while back I had asked some Instagramers for feedback on what they wanted me to bake and I settled on “Lemon Bars with a Badi twist” what the fuck is a Badi twist, is this some sort of Merchant of Venice shit where I add a pound of flesh? I have some health concerns with this. I eventually settled on a far less grotesque twist, champagne and flowers. Well I thought it would be less grotesque up until the moment is came out of the oven smelling like a warm tray of death. It didn’t taste so bad though, it just tasted like a cool bar of sadness. Well that twist sucked.
Ok, take two, I saw something on Instagram with some rando pushing flowers into a jelly type thing and I thought “hey, why don’t I be the rando pushing flowers into a jelly type substance?” and an idea was born.
Let’s get to making it
In the mother fucking mix
- 226g butter, room temperature
- 100g white sugar
- 256g all-purpose flour
- 4 eggs, room temperature
- 300g white sugar
- 32g all-purpose flour
- 160m fresh squeezed lemon juice
- Zest of one lemon
- 100 ml boiled water
- 2 teaspoons gelatin
- 300 ml cold rose water
- 1 packet edible flowers, rinsed and dried
Mixing that shit
- Preheat oven to 175 degrees C.
- In a medium bowl, blend together softened butter, flour and sugar with pastry cutter, a fork, or your hands. Press into the bottom of a 9×13 inch pan lined with baking parchment.
- Bake for 15 to 20 minutes in the preheated oven, or until firm and golden.
- Remove from oven and prepare the filling
- For the filling, whisk together sugar and flour. Beat eggs in a separate bowl, then whisk them into the sugar and flour mixture. Add lemon juice and zest to the mixture. Pour over the baked crust.
- Bake for an additional 20 minutes in the oven.
- Remove from oven to cool completely before allowing to set in the fridge for at least 2 hours.
- Pour hot water into a bowl and mix in gelatin until dissolved.
- Top up the gelatin with cold rose water
- Reserve ¼ of jelly and allow to thicken slightly in the fridge. 15-20 minutes.
- Brush the slightly thickened jelly over the lemon bars, (it will absorb slightly) place into the freezer for 10 minutes to set.
- Pour the remaining ¾ jelly over the lemon bar, push flowers into the jelly using a chopstick or butter knife.
- Leave in the fridge until set.
- Cut into squares and serve.
So, was this thang good? I made this for my wild ass family, none of whom know how to be gentle with me and this is how they felt about it. Well, the grown-ups enjoyed it but the kiddies hated it. Lemon ain’t for everyone, I’m sorry to have failed you kiddies, at least the big grown-ups liked it, and if we are to be honest, kids have poor taste anyway.
Did I love this shit? I did, I really did but like any human I might have stumbled over my feet a bit. Ok, so what didn’t I do amazingly? So, I might have overdone it slightly, ever so slightly on the lemon zest and the sugar in the jelly, I might reduce both by a quarter the next time. My family members seemed to take no issue but my beloved Lufuno (Miss Party) really loves all lemon baked goods anyway, heck I could give her a whole baked lemon and she would smile ear to ear.
I found the lemon and rose water combination to be fun, like a twisted Turkish delight. The flowers added no flavor and were purely for aesthetic purposes, I loved seeing them suspended in the jelly. I also loved the texture shift of jelly and lemon bar, I can’t explain why but changes in texture just make food more fun.
I think in future I might have a bit more fun and add some berries or peaches into the lemon mix before baking, I mean, let’s do that summer-y thang.
Haha. Post Blog, I completely fucked up and accidentally increased the heat and baked this bitch too high for like 10 minutes. Oh well, it really wasn’t the end of the world.